Monday, May 11, 2009

The Day After Mother's Day

Dear Mom,
Mother’s Day was different this year. I knew it would be, but somehow, it still caught me by surprise. I’m sorry I couldn’t be home this year. Do you remember the last time we spent Mother’s Day together? It was 2006- you and Dad came to Birmingham to help me move into my new apartment… and meet my new boyfriend, Rob.
Rob is my husband now, and I’m going to be a mom soon. So yesterday meant a little more to me. I found myself more excited than usual, more nostalgic, and more thankful. I thought a lot about the kind of mom I want to be.
Thanks for setting a good example for me, beginning with your marriage. Tomorrow, you & Dad will celebrate 36 years since you said, “I do.” Congratulations! Thanks for keeping that commitment a priority. And thank you for retiring 33 years ago, to stay at home and raise your children. I know that isn’t an option for everyone, and I’m grateful for the sacrifices you and Dad made for our benefit.
You told me one time that you “didn’t raise your kids to be independent, you raised them to need [you].” And I’m afraid that may have backfired on you! There may have been a lot of tears and guilt trips, but you let us go. Realize it or not, whether I lived in another city or state or country, I’ve always needed you. Thank you for pushing me in school (I probably wouldn’t have been an honor student on my own), for making me earn money to pay for the expensive things I wanted (like class trips), and for putting our family first (we’ve all tried to forget those years you were in school). I may be more independent than anyone ever expected, but it’s only because you gave me strength, courage, and wings to fly.
Probably the most important thing you ever gave me, though, was Jesus. I know I caught you off guard when I knocked on your bedroom door in the middle of the night so many years ago. I’m pretty sure you were scared, and praying was all you knew to do. Thank you for leading me to the Lord that night. Thank you for giving me to Him all over again at camp when we both knew at the same moment that God was calling me to missions, and again when I was in college and making myself ill with stress, and again not long after that when I got on a plane by myself headed to a country I’d never been.
I’m not going to say that I want to do everything just like you did, but then again, I hope my own children don’t act just like I did either! I appreciate you, Mom, and all you’ve done for me and taught me over the years. This isn’t super creative, or the most eloquent letter I’ve ever written; I just wanted to tell you I love you, and thank you for helping prepare me for motherhood.
Love, jess


This picture is just for you, Mom... 13.5 weeks (taken this morning)




3 comments:

Becky said...

Congrats on the pregnancy!!

Shanna Bauman said...

Okay so you have me crying!! This is sooo precious! You look great!

Nanette R. said...

Thanking God for answered prayer...congrats on your pregnancy! :-)